I’ve run this distance before, I know how awesome it can be and I know how much it can hurt. I’ve crossed the finish line feeling pure ecstasy and I’ve thrown myself over it crying uncontrollably. What the race will bring on Sunday, I don’t know but I hope that I enjoy it. I’ve trained too hard, sacrificed too much (and chafed in too many places) not to finish with a smile.
My overarching memories of the Paris marathon are of pain, disappointment and failure. Don’t get me wrong, I loved running with Billie, trying to take selfies by the Eiffel Tower and taking in the sights of the French capital, but I can’t shake the negative feelings.
And that has put me in a bad headspace for Sunday. I have worked so hard this Summer and seen my paces improve significantly. I beat my half marathon PB on a hungover training run. I’ve run Yasso 800’s fast enough and early enough to make me vom. I have established what sort of training plan works for me, note to self-16 weeks is too long, I get antsy.
I’ve also tested Tom’s patience in my addiction to running to breaking point. Regardless of the outcome on Sunday, I am giving myself a ‘season’ off the marathon (unless of course I get into London, obviously).
I want Berlin to feel like New York, where although there was pain and there were tears, there were a lot of smiles. I completed the New York City Marathon feeling unstoppable, and awesome and like a real runner. I know they won’t all be PBs and they won’t all feel great, but I will be trying my utmost to ensure that this one is.
I know the pressure is only from myself, no-one cares about my time nearly as much as I do. The training is done, now it comes down to mental strength (and fueling/stretching/not falling flat on my face one mile in). If my finish is going to be positive, I’ve got to start thinking positively.
A marathon is 90% mental, the other 10% is in your head.